My Love

Do you know what my son did tonight? He helped me unload the dishwasher. For real! Bowl breaking and glass thrashing wasn't even a little part of the task. He actually picked every piece of tupperware and the lids off the cleaning rack and slammed them in the correct drawer. When he was finished, I clapped and cheered for him the way I do when I'm proud....no surprise there. I'm his biggest fan!

Normally, I praise him to encourage him, but this time I was really blown away. He surely knew how genuine my applause was, because he emptied out the drawer of tupperware and refilled it several times to get my wild reaction over and over again. And each time he completed the task, he was equally as happy as the first time. That's my boy!

I've been to the yoga studio a LOT these past couple weeks either to teach a class or take a class. When my parents were in town last week, I think I was there every single day for one reason or another. They even came with Max and me to family yoga! Now that they're gone, we're back to the ho-hum regular, after a busy week with the grandparents.

I literally squeezed in every single thing I needed to do while my parents were here. Their visit began with an abrupt visit to the dentist for me. I don't think we even went home after I picked them up from LAX and I got some chipped teeth repaired. Yes, that was the kind of week it was. They did a lot of babysitting and I did a lot of everything else under the sun that needed and wanted to be done. Thanks mom and dad!

More random news on the home front:

Max has a big toe nail that is about to fall off. It is grossing me out and making me cringe. I don't think I've ever lost a toe nail before and I feel so bad for him. He constantly picks and pulls at it if his shoes aren't on, so he's basically living in his pedipeds these days. Yowzers!

Today a mom said to me, "Isn't it nice to go to work and get a break from him!" And I just didn't relate to that comment very well. Yes, I loooove teaching yoga. It is a perfect job for me in many ways, but I always miss Max when I leave him. It's funny because even though I have two part time jobs, I still sort of consider myself a stay at home mom. Maybe if I made enough money to pay my bills I would consider myself employed....hahaha! Well, I'm actually getting closer and closer to that every month!

Max is still obsessed with his lovey. Today someone said, "Is that his boom boom?" And I smiled and said "Yes!" Because whether you call it his puppy, blankie, or as we call it, his lovey, it has been his favorite comfort item since he was born. We always put it with him in the bassinet when he was sleeping without me and now he drags it around everywhere he goes like Linus on Charlie Brown. I've tried to replace it with a bunny, a teddy bear, and even a ridiculously soft hippo, but no other object compares.

This peaceful sight is what you see when you look up lovey in the dictionary. Goodnight with love....xoxo

Smashing Thoughtfulness

Vinyasas, sun salutations, and asanas fill my mind. Kitty cat and baby love surround me. Attacks penetrate me. Decisions confuse me. Logic grounds me and passion fills me with the ability to embrace change.

It's safe to say I deserve a big bear hug for being strong and resilient. And hey, I will throw in a pat on the back along with a comforting coconut water. Life is good, eh! It would be an understatement to say I have been in a thoughtful mood lately.

A few "rock my world" moments have caught me off guard lately. Some good. Some bad. But ultimately it is all good because an epiphany is a discovery of sorts. And to realize is to learn, and hopefully we all strive to learn more, find truth, and be better people.

Affirmation #1: At the end of yoga class my teacher started talking about healthy relationships and I started to cry. The epiphany was the realization that an unhealthy relationship has made its way into my life. That leads into a whirlwind of thoughts that of course include the relationship I have with myself...

Affirmation #2: Some people will always blame a problem on something trivial. The problem is never the socks on the floor or the dinner that is not made. I repeat. Such trivial dilemmas are never the problem.

Affirmation #3: My son loves me more than anything. There is no toy, no magic trick, and no replacement for a baby's mom. He has learned to wrap his arms around my neck and give me hugs! As if I wasn't already, now and I am constantly reminded of his love for me. Gosh, I am such a blessed mommy.

I should write a blog on each of these affirmations because I could go into so much detail. What might seem like nothing to one person might truly mean the world to another person. The individual lens that every person looks through to gain their own perspective sure does make life interesting.

Baby Max's first birthday party was a huge success. Well, depending on how you look at it. Aesthetically, it was perfect, but I was a nervous wreck...definitely not normal party-Lizzy-mode. With a full week's schedule of work and yoga teacher training, my focus was scattered.

The best part of the party was the smash cake made by Aunt Nori. She made an applesauce-sweetened banana bread with blueberries and vegan cream cheese frosting. The whole cake thing was kind of a big deal. We debated back and forth over whether to get the $10 Costco cake or the pain in the neck $60 ice cream cake from Baskin Robbins for the adults.

Of course we opted for the mint chocolate chip frozen delight over the cheap Costco cake. That was a childhood favorite of mine and for some strange, incomprehensible reason, I just had to have it.

In typical one-year-old fashion, baby Max slept through the first half of his party. Grandma and Grandpa woke him up and then panic mode started to set in over the fact that the cake was 2 blocks away at Baskin Robbins. We did not have room for the enormous cake in our freezer so we had to pick it up in the middle of the party.

Grandpa Bernie was originally going to grab the cake for us, but he was manning the grill on the rooftop deck and I decided we might need to look at a second option. So I asked one of our friends who had volunteered to help with the party to walk down the street and pick up the cake for us.

I must have appeared completely distressed because they responded by looking at me like I was a little nuts. Well of course I was nuts. We needed to sing happy birthday and we hadn't picked the cake up yet. Then I started remembering why I didn't want to have an ice cream cake in the first place. I knew we would have this problem!

So after asking my friends to get the cake they continued to enjoy their conversation as most people do at a party. I couldn't very well scream 9-1-1 so they would realize the urgency by which I needed this cake on my counter right NOW so i would have time to arrange the candles and the birthday boy for his big moment. If anyone was going to get that cake, it would have to be me.

Leaving the party for a bit was the best thing I could have done. It helped me to take a step back and realize it's just a party and I didn't need to feel so uptight. It was also nice to have the cake in my hands and know that this task was being taken care of.

Sweet Max is so special that he had two cakes, and after singing happy birthday with the big cake, we sang again with his own personal smash cake made by his Aunt Nori. We took off his shirt so he could get down and dirty. It was the highlight of my week to see him banging on his homemade dessert. And yes, the fact that it was vegan and sugar free was literally icing on the cake.
I love this low resolution picture. It looks kind of antique-y and maybe it masks the bags under my eyes.

Sending shouts out to Aunt Nori for making the smash cake and Aunt Paisley for picking up the balloons. Thanks girls!

Toothbrushes are Toys and Dirt is a Food Group

The rambunctiousness is not limited to the playground, and one can find so much to finagle in a single cabinet with a turntable. Or not. After assessing the situation, I decided that we don't have to go to the park to go exploring. So the remainder of the cleaning supplies got moved under the sink where there is a childproof lock on those cabinets. So the fun never has to end, and I get a kick out of seeing baby Max standing upright inside his cavern.

Yogi mommy plus happy baby equals full time fun. As if it wasn't already official, I'm fully immersed in my teaching training program at Earth's Power Yoga. My energies are scattered and I'm spread too thin, but it's still awesome. I'm taking four yoga classes a week as part of my preparations to teach and that is my favorite part. Mama's lookin' good and getting strong! Woohoo!!!

It has probably been harder on Marc than anyone because he has Max for six hours in a row on Sundays, but he's made it through two weeks so far. He always looks so exhausted when I get home and asks me how I do it all day every single day. That is slightly gratifying, because being a parent is such an important job. But regardless of how tired Marc is, he is always happy to cook dinner. That cracks me up that no matter how chaotic his day was, he enjoys a retreat into the kitchen where he effortlessly whips up bok choy, quinoa, chard, snapper, and anything else in season that sounds tasty. Pretty fantastic if you ask most mommies! So when I feel annoyed that he is up all night playing video games on his phone or computer, I think about how good dinner was....hahaha!!!

Getting to my classes seems to be the easy part now that we have that figured out. Finding time to read the eight assigned books and summarizing them in four page long essays....Now that's a different story. It is so ridiculously difficult to read a single article with a baby in the house, and I have absolutely no idea how I am going read eight books. I might have to pull a casper and disappear into the abyss of a couch at the library without a baby's cry within earshot. Distractions are unavoidable with all the responsibilities I have at home!

We always make time for the fun stuff. And our Thursdays at the park are no exception. Max trampled his girlfriend, Everly a few times this week, but fortunately she is resilient. And in case you haven't heard, it is true. Toothbrushes are toys and dirt is a food group!

Plan B

The biggest news we have these days is that Max is sleeping in his crib and only gets up a couple times a night now. The way we initially devised the plan was not the way I carried out the plan. But sometimes you have to go to plan B.

Plan B involved me jumping up and down through out the night like a jack in the box. I could no longer breast feed him laying down in the middle of the night because I would fall asleep while nursing. And then forget about waking up to put Max back in the crib. I was too tired to care, and too absent minded to think about the baby sleeping anywhere else besides right next to me. So I would breast feed in the rocking chair and lay him back in the crib when I was finished.

It sounds like a really easy process, but nothing was easy that first week. It was harder on me than anyone. It wasn't very hard on Marc (except for a couple feedings he did) because he slept in another room and couldn't hear what was going on. And it wasn't hard on Max, because he always got and continues to get fed and soothed whenever he needs. But for me it was brutal.

We put the air mattress in Max's bedroom for me to lay down on after feeding him. That was especially useful when Max wouldn't go right back to sleep after a feeding. I could lay him down in his crib, and if he woke up I would be right there in his room to assure him that he was ok rather than running back and forth from one room to another.

Most importantly, I am very pleased with the results. We didn't use any cry it out methods or any baby training techniques. We didn't subscribe to the Ferber method or any other nutballs. We stuck with basic attachment parenting principles and hold your breath. Dun dun dunnnnn.....maternal instincts.

The easiest way to transition a baby to a crib this way is to have the father do all the night time feedings with a bottle. That way they still get their milk without looking to the boob for comfort all through out the night. But I crossed the hardest hump on my own before Marc's mom came in town. She did almost all the night feedings and helped me out tremendously. I think that really allowed us all to adjust to our new sleeping arrangements.

And just to clarify, I would start off co-sleeping if I had to do it over again. There is no way in the world I would have been able to hop up and down to breast feed every hour or two in the beginning. I'm certain that there is no way I would have succeeded with much separation between us. I believe mommies and babies are meant to be very close together in the beginning to develop a strong, secure bond.

Max is doing tons of adorable things that are much more interesting than just sleeping. He's been eating solid foods for well over a month now. It took a while to care about food, and now that he does I think he's obsessed. Today he wouldn't stop eating and Marc just kept feeding and feeding him. Marc thought he would know when to stop eating because he was full, but that was absolutely not the case.

Marc fed him hummus, a little slice of a peach, and a ton of sweet potato. He wouldn't stop eating sweet potato and Marc thought he was still hungry. Later when Max threw up we decided that it is our job to have portion control in mind after a certain amount. If he really likes the taste of a food, he might never stop eating if we don't stop feeding him.

We also like to feed him some foods such as avocado, banana, and boiled carrots that he can feed himself. It's fun for him and keeps him busy while we are doing other things in the kitchen. Here's Max in his high chair where he hangs out and watches me make shakes and clean dishes. The blender doesn't even phase him because he is so used to the noise. This is part of our routine almost every single day.

Marc's mom brought her friend Barbara with her to visit us and they stayed for a whole week. We went to some really fun events together. We all went to the movies and saw "The Town" with Ben Affleck. It was a great plot with a tremendous amount of violence. I got to see a fair amount of the flick except for when Max was talking to the big screen and we had to take some breaks to go sit outside.

We went to the Ahmanson Theatre to see "Leap of Faith" with Brooke Shields. It wasn't up to Broadway's standards, but we enjoyed it. I was so excited about getting out with the girls in my high heels that I wasn't paying attention and ungracefully fell down a small flight of stairs. Let's just say, "Ow, I'm still sore from that mistake!"

One night we got a babysitter and all went out to a comedy show at the Groundlings. We laughed our butts off and probably got a little ab workout that night. It was an absolute blast.

And for some "me" time, I went to a few yoga classes, got a massage, rode my bike, and got lots of extra sleep. That's really all it takes to make me happy. That was such a treat for me to do these things that I love and come home to the cutest baby in the world. It's amazing how he becomes even cuter after the opportunity to be selfish....I am so blessed!

I'm obsessed

My obsession is with watching my baby sleep. It is the most peaceful sight in the whole entire world. Snuggled up blissfully like a little birdie in his nest is usually how he drifts off. Sometimes I think I will never see this magical sight again, until he finally tires into a milk coma. This is heaven.

Things get easier all the time....and time is flying! We rarely have a sleepless night anymore, and when we do, we are able to take a big, fat nap. Sometimes 7am seems like the worst day in the world, but by about 11 things are all good again. Naptime is the best, and suddenly it is the best day in the world!

He's gotten to eat a few solid foods, but I may change my approach to baby led solids. That way Max can eat soft foods such as avocado at his own will rather than me feel like I'm force feeding him. Every time I hold a spoonful of anything up to his mouth he arches his back and leans away from me. He just turned 6 months old yesterday, so it's not like he needs more than a taste anyway. So far he loves bananas, hates green beans, and might have liked sweet potatoes for part of a split second.

I got to go to an awesome power yoga class tonight. I bet I am sore tomorrow. Even though I've been going on lots of hikes, I'm not in stellar yoga shape. This class is a butt kicker for people that are in rockin' shape, so it was definitely a tough one for me today. It was so wonderful to go to a really hard yoga class that wasn't "baby and me". And it's even more wonderful for Max to have time with Daddy without me to sweep in every time Max fusses or needs something.

I can't believe Marc told me a few months ago that he would be the best volleyball player at the beach if he were a stay at home mom. I didn't say much because I was probably looking at him like he was crazy. He explained to me that he would play with all guys that had babies and they would rotate one at a time and that guy would take care of all the babies. Yeah, he seriously did say that. Like one guy could take care of 4 babies. That statement right there told me I need to leave Marc with Max more often. He couldn't have spelled it out any more clearly.

Since it is so easy, Marc will be taking over several nights a week for a couple hours while I go to a yoga class. The funny thing is he looks beat to a pulp when I get home. It's absolutely hilarious to see how two hours can tire a guy out. He is always so grateful to see me walk in the door and usually has a story about how many diapers or baths Max needed while I was gone.

I really hope Marc doesn't read this because he probably doesn't realize how ridiculous he sounded. Tonight when I got home Marc told me that he didn't play one single video game the whole time he was watching Max. HAHAHA!!! No kidding! You really didn't sit on your butt, eat bonbons and watch all your favorite tv shows? Huh? But I thought it was so easy....I'm still laughing at this one.

And the little story about how Max peed on himself after his first bath and he needed a second one was fantastic. That has happened to me so many times. I usually forget about that after a few throw-uppy burps. I mean really, who's counting. I'm not sure how many baths Max gets in a given day. It probably depends on how many bodily functions were out of control and had bad timing. That is usually a high number, so there is no telling!

So now Marc tells me he was wrong about his volleyball theory. I secretly LOVE it when he admits that I was right and he was wrong. Basically, I just love it that he appreciates me and the job that I do. He has been telling me every day that I am such a good mom and he doesn't know how I do it all day and night every day and every night. It is so nice to hear that.

Yesterday Marc told me he wished he had taken maternity leave when Max was born. It's hard to believe that one simple statement like that could evoke so much emotion. But it made me cry. He finally realizes that it takes a "village".